Disillusioned Youth?

The youth is the future... i keep thinking

Two days back i heard this horrific news which has left me resurrecting since then.

It was about the quietus of a friend or more precisely an acquaintance. She was one year elder to me, all of 20.We were neighbours for about an year in a west delhi locality called bali nagar and then my family shifted. I don't remember having anything even close to a conversation with her but i do reckon some instances wherein she left an impression on me. She came across as a beaming, bright, beautiful young woman from a well-off family... she had all the reasons to be confident and positive and it appeared that she was. It appeared to me, until day before,when i learned that it wasn't a natural death. An ambiguous irk develops inside of my brain everytime I draw imagination of her taking her life away from herself. What could it be that made her do something so antithesis of her own self. Got to know that she was depressed regardig her first year results. Maybe that... No, thats not possible. I opine she was stronger than that or to say she was less academically bent than that. I can take that bad result could be one of the reasons. but one of the reasons... NOT THE REASON... its a mystery and will always be... two nights i have been dreaming about her... maybe another week... thats how my system is...But the question would linger whenever my mind takes its hands off the daily routine clamor.

i wonder...


A nepalese guy with all possible piercings and a ice cool attitude... the sort of attitudes that are tailored to get girls drooling over...dies of over dosage of drugs...

This one is about a guy from my college who was found dead at his apartment a few months ago. This news met my ears and i was to be numb for the next 24 hours. I cried, collapsed, questioned all within myself. All this wasn't because i had lost someone (i hardly knew him... just faintly recollect pictures of him roaming around in the campus) but someone had lost him... actually many a someone had lost him. But even this wasn't what shuddered me but this: We(humans) had lost another someone to them(drugs).......

I wonder...
at night when sleep tricks me for hours...
and when my mind has thought over and over again
about how wonderful life will be when my love is around again
and about how sweet will the ultimate success taste,
thoughts about off beat things haunt me...
thoughts about youth, life, death and consequence

IS THIS WHAT WE HAVE BECOME?....
IS DISILLUSIONMENT THE NEW DEFINITION OF YOUTH?

I wonder...
wondering still..........